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How Can Substance Use Disorder Affect My Relationships?

If you are seeking recovery from substance use disorder (SUD), you have probably started to notice how your condition has negatively impacted your well-being. One facet of your well-being that has likely reaped the consequences of your SUD is your relationships. 

Social Work in Public Health states, "The effects of a substance use disorder (SUD) are felt by the whole family." Therefore, understanding how substance use and SUD can uniquely affect your social and interpersonal relationships is essential.

Understanding Substance Use Disorder

The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) explains that a SUD develops when an individual's recurrent use of alcohol or other drugs continues despite the harmful consequences that their use is causing on their life. Although these consequences may surface differently for each person, common areas of well-being that are affected by SUD include:

  • Health, including physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual

  • Cognitive functioning, such as impaired judgment or reduced motivation

  • Ability to meet responsibilities at work, school, or home

  • Financial stability

  • Relationships

To effectively recover from SUD, it is important to seek healing in these areas of well-being. 

The Impact of SUD on Relationships

When a family member or friend engages in substance use, it is only a matter of time before their relationships are affected. This can surface in various ways, with each relationship impacted uniquely. The journal above published an article titled "The Impact of Substance Use Disorders on Families and Children," highlighting several negative impacts SUD can have on interpersonal relationships. Here are a few examples:

Disruption of Attachment

In families, SUD can inevitably disrupt the development of a healthy and secure attachment style. 

First, consider a parent struggling with a SUD. This parent may be unable to adequately show up for their children as they grow through their most critical developmental years. They may become violent or abusive under the influence, which can leave a child feeling scared, anxious, and unloved. Often, younger children of these parents may feel that their parent's behavior is their fault rather than the fault of their SUD. 

Another individual that can experience attachment disruptions as a result of SUD is a spouse. Both partners may feel disconnected when one partner is actively struggling with substance use. The partner with SUD may create an environment of secrecy, which can create further conflict in their relationship with their spouse. The spouse could take on enabling behaviors to help their partner recover. Additionally, the spouse also experiences an increased risk of developing SUD.

Interpersonal Communication

Another relational factor that SUD impacts is communication. As mentioned previously, environments of secrecy and conflict are often increased when individual struggles with SUD. However, individuals may also isolate from their loved ones due to fear of judgment and misunderstanding of their condition. If accused of using alcohol and other drugs, they may deny such behavior and respond aggressively. Loved ones may turn away or set boundaries to motivate their loved one to participate in treatment.

Alcohol and other drugs, especially communication pathways, interfere with nearly all brain areas. As a result, an individual will experience compromised functioning in speech, memory, judgment, and decision-making, among other functions. These consequences are not only evident when an individual is under the influence of a substance but tend to last long after the effects of a drug have worn off. But when a loved one has not experienced SUD themselves, they may not understand the severity of how their condition is impacting their communication. Due to the misconception of SUD being a "choice," these misunderstandings can lead to break-ups in friendships.

Social Life

SUD will also impact an individual's social life. When a person starts engaging in substance use or develops SUD, they will develop new routines that enable their addictive behaviors. For example, an individual may only hang around others who also engage in substance use. They could also engage in isolating behavior, withdrawing from social life altogether. 

Drug use can also increase paranoia about relationships. For example, some may think that their friends will turn against them. Others may experience increased anxiety and take comments and opinions more personally. Further, many will become self-centered and oblivious to the concerns of others. 

Confronting Blame, Shame, and Guilt

When considering your SUD's impact on your relationships, you may feel guilty, depressed, or overwhelmed with yourself. While it can be beneficial to work through these emotions, it is also important to consider what situations and circumstances caused you to engage with alcohol and other drugs in the first place.

Unfortunately, our relationships often initiate our participation in substance use. For some, this may surface as peer pressure or an opportunity to ease curiosity with people you trust. Others may have grown up in households where parents regularly engaged in substance use and mirrored their parents' behaviors. 

It is also important to shed light on the issue of substance use in society. Mainstream media praises and glorifies the recreational use of drugs. Adolescents and young adults anxiously await their 21st birthday to have their first legal drink. These circumstances all likely played into your initial decision to use substances. But what begins as an innocent attempt to ease curiosity or adhere to social norms can cause long-lasting consequences, especially on SUD and relationships.

Substance use disorder can wreak havoc on all aspects of an individual's life, especially their relationships. Working to recover from addiction requires understanding how substance use has impacted those around you. Next Level Recovery Associates understands that this process is overwhelming, so we are dedicated to walking with you along the way. Our recovery companions work tirelessly to provide support and knowledge about addiction and recovery to those seeking healing. We believe in utilizing an individualized approach and meeting our clients exactly where they are on the road to recovery. To learn more about the range of services we offer or how we can best help you, contact consult@nextlevelra.com.